I am excited that Dave and Denis gave me another chance to use this zero carb blog to journal my experience on zero carb. I am not going to dwell in the past. Dave spoke to me about a subject that Denis wrote to him. About my failure to acknowledge my carbohydrate addiction. Denis is totally right. I can't move forward with that in the background. As anyone knows carbohydrates can be very addictive. I have spent the last couple of days trying to flush them out of my system by eating just beef and drinking lots of water. I really don't know if that will help, but it makes me feel good about the effort and a realization that carbs are killers. While I was off eating zero carb I ate lots of carbs. I would go back and forth eating carbs, then not. This combination backfired on me. I have now gained so much weight that I am miserable. As of today I weight 260 lbs. I am so ashamed of myself. Every time I would go off eating carbs I would load up on that last day thinking this is it, never again. With that justification I would eat carbs until I felt sick. Again I would justify it by telling myself it was the last time I would eat carbs. I feel so stupid with the way I would rationalize my addiction. I am praying that enough is enough. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I am not just saying it. I really feel tired all the time. I am out of breath, all I want to do now a days is just sleep. I am so fat that my clothes don't fit right and I am ashamed of the way I look.
I plan to take it day by day. The only thing I will plan in the future is my preparation of meals. Dave has drilled it into my head that if nothing else, prepare meals ahead of time. Have plenty of zero carb friendly options available. He also said that being hungry is not a sin. If I find myself in a situation of eating carbs or no food, choose no food until I can find something friendly to eat. No excuses. This will be a challenge for me. Yet I am determined to give it my best shot. I am at rock bottom and have no where else to go. Dave wants me to have a simple format of what foods I ate and approximately how much. I told him that a daily weigh in would not bother me and would help me. I know that weight goes up and down and I not concerned that I will get discouraged about the numbers. I have always like the idea of a morning fast and do not get hungry until later in the day most of the time anyway. I guess I will mirror a lot that Dave did while he was losing weight. From what I read it agrees with me. I do like coffee and plan to drink it as I do know in the morning. I drink it black without anything in it. I will try to post everyday. That is it for now.
1st meal: 3 eggs, 3 bacon strips and 4 oz of pan sausage
2nd meal: 14 ounce ground chuck patty grilled